top of page
Search

Be Alone But Not Lonely

Updated: Feb 1, 2023

May 17, 2021


I can’t seem to have a conversation with anyone these days without hearing how COVID is affecting their mental health and how lonely life has become. Yes, COVID has changed and rearranged our lives in ways that we didn’t imagine or anticipate. Yes, we had not planned for this new way of being. At the same time, COVID has also done something to and for us. It has forced us to spend time alone. Forced is the operative word. We were pushed into isolation and, for many, into darkness.



Recently in conversation with my woman friend, she reassured me that though she is alone, she is not lonely. That was a powerful statement. There’s a huge difference between being lonely and being alone. That conversation led me to revisit the many discussions that I had had previously with individuals about the value of being alone; the value of being your own best friend and dating yourself.


For so many, being alone is like a death sentence; it is scary. Presently, many are identifying being alone due to COVID, as a huge bruise to their mental well-being. The feeling of isolation is creating anxiety and fear amongst many. The message I want to share here is, “Don’t be afraid of being with yourself!”






Yes, having people around at all times seems to be a normal lifestyle for most. Physically grouping, touching, and socially gathering have always been defined as normal, healthy and needed but being alone can have its benefits as well. Yes, what we have perceived as “normal” is no longer operating in the same way. But what is normal? Was the previous norm the best thing for us all? Can there be a different form of “normal?” Is being normal synonymous to being healthy? Well, it depends on who is speaking. It also depends on how we can benefit from this new norm. Could being alone be beneficial?






In my efforts to “make sense out of nonsense,” I used a microscopic lens to accept and appreciate another form of normalcy. I have always known that if I can’t change things, I’d better learn how to manage them. I shifted back to the statement that my friend made recently, “I am alone but I am not lonely.” One of the many trials and tribulations that COVID imposed upon us is the experience of being alone more than usual. With this rearrangement, we are encouraged to be alone, a state that can have many, many advantages.


This is the time for us to embrace solitude. With solitude comes rewards such as, but not limited to, increased empathy, lessened negativity, boosted creativity and increased emotional intelligence. Solitude can create time for self-reflection, recharging , exploration of new interests and the development of a new sense of self. I’d say solitude is a gift!


“Take yourself on a date and become your own best friend!”

“You don’t have to be lonely!”






40 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Dream : An Empire State of Mind

January 31, 2022 A time comes when you will have to stand on your own and indulge in your dreams. When this time pops up on you, you must be prepared to shift into gear and get on track. You must be c

A Healthy Colon for a Long, Quality Life

I recently lost someone close to Colon Cancer. She was youthful, intelligent, vibrant and ready for any challenge that came her way. She struggled quietly with colon cancer. I say quietly because she

10 Things to Stop in 2022

January 6, 2021 STOP! 1. Judging others by projecting your own insecurities 2. Sharing false information when you are not qualified on an issue 3. Seeing yourself as inferior and second to others 4. E

Comments


bottom of page